Modern Frustrations

We put a man on the moon, drive electric cars and talk on pocket-sized devices that communicate on the internet but we as a species still can't design a paper towel dispenser that doesn't get fucking jammed all the time.

Escape

The escape key. Stately and proud, it stands alone at the top left hand corner of the keyboard, always there to stop whatever destructive action you just started by accident. It's the original Back button.

I'm A Marketing Expert!

I think Always tampons should sponsor NHL games so they can wish everyone a happy period.

Questions That Have No Answer About Metro Passengers

I don't understand why someone walks up to a metro seat, looks at it, decides that it's too dirty to sit on and then tries to wipe off the crap or whatever's on it with their hand. When it doesn't work, they walk away and pick another seat.

If the seat is so disgusting that you don't want to sit on it, why the hell did you touch it with your hand in the first place?

One Big, Happy Medical Family

I wonder if you took all the footage of ER, Chicago Hope, St. Elsewhere, Scrubs, House, Grey's Anatomy, and General Hospital, and edited them all together, could you make it seem they're all working together at the same hospital?

I Don't Know What You're Talking About, So Here's A Picture Of Me With A Funny Cushion On My Head

The Person Who Said

"It's the journey, not the destination" obviously didn't have a career in project management.